Tell me a joke funny guy

Hope you enjoyed Fat Tuesday y'all (we're Southerner's sometimes). As we're sure you know... last Tuesday was Mardi Gras therefore we joined the rest of KC- and the world- in the festivities. Kesh headed to Jazz for dinner and drinks. Unfortunately the original was insanely crowded, so she tried out the Legends* location with her hubs, LDye. [Ain't nobody got time for a 2 hour wait. But really, there was no time for that. We had plans for after din.] If you can't be in NOLA during Mardi Gras, Jazz is the next best place to be. Jac had a Mardi Gras celebration at work and was all jambalaya'd out by 4:30p.

Ass to dick crowded in NOLA on Mardi Gras 

How'd you get those beads girl?....

For those of you who are unaware of the meaning of Mardi Gras, it's French for Fat Tuesday; which is a day devoted to reflecting the practice of the last night of eating richer, fatty foods before the ritual fasting of the Lenten season (thanks Wiki). In other words, it's the day before Ash Wednesday so those who are giving up something for Lent take advantage of eating all the good stuff before resisting for 40 days. As for the rest of us, we just don't want to miss out on a celebration involving good food and spirits. Cheers to being rich and fat! So we hope you made last tuesday's meal a good one and had a piece of King Cake for good measure.

As we mentioned, Mardi Gras isn't just about food.. it's a celebration. We tried something new by hanging out with some friends at Standford's Comedy Club. It was Open Mic Night at the club which happens every Tuesday. One of our co-workers, Seth, was trying some new material so we gladly went to watch and support. He was hilarious! Standford's is a Kansas City staple that has had so many amazing comedians come through. It would be such a rush to go up on stage where so many greats performed.  If you go to open mic night be ready to laugh- but also be ready to feel incredibly uncomfortable at times because some of the acts were... not so good. BUT we must say it takes some balls to go up there. #respect. Maybe we will make our way up on stage one of these days. It will just take some a lot of liquid courage. 

We've got jokes--- I just flew in from Chicago and MAN are my arms tired!

Ba dum ching!

-k & j

Comment below to let us know how you spent your Mardi Gras and your best joke! We promise we won't steal it...

#keshandjac and share your adventures around KC

*No disrespect to the Legends location. It was just as good as the one on 39th Street, but with a much shorter wait.

Come One, Come All

If you were wondering why we didn't post anything for Friday Fit day-- it's because we were too busy preparing for the evening's festivities. {Drinking > Working out. We clearly have our priorities in order.} The prep included the essentials- GTL. Just kidding. This isn't the Jersey Shore. Our preparations are more of a NEF? Nap, Eat - important before drinking, Figure out what to wear...

Friday night was the first KC Midnight Underground Circus hosted by Live KC. {This is why picking out our attire for the night was a struggle. What does one wear to an underground circus?} The circus was equipped with carnival games, a light show, a fire act, professional dancers, AND the ever hyped super secret musical performance. Drum roll please ....it was SALT-N-FREAKING-PEPPA.

 

I heard some people were disappointed with the act. No idea why cause they are music icons and we thoroughly enjoyed it. 90's music is where it's at.

Although we had an amazing time-- we strong believers that the night is what you make it---If Live KC puts this on again, they might want to consider making a couple changes. If you know anyone that attended the circus last night and you have Facebook, you know there were some complaints..

Our biggest complaint? THE LINES and the w a i t i n g in said lines. The lines at the bars were ridic. At one point we waited 45 minutes for a beer! Hate to complain about free drinks, but there are def better ways to have the free booze set up.

The game lines were a bit long as well, but we got down on some Pop-S-Shot and supersized Beer Pong. The prizes weren't bad either. For beer pong, the winners received a Live KC tee (K got one like a boss) and the losers got coffee from The Roasterie.

 

On a more positive note, the ticket check-in and coat check processes were smooth sailing. I know that has been an issue in the past with some other events around KC.  There was also plenty of space to get down to "Whatta Man" and "Push It" on the dance floor. Does "Push It" make anyone else think of Grandma's Boy?

 

We do hope that Live KC puts on the show again next year. The event has a lot of potential. Our biggest suggest---> a beer fountain! That's a genius way to keep the beer flowing and the complaints to a minimum.

 

One of the only photos of the night!

 Sorry about the lack of photos. We were having too much fun to remember to take them.

 

Good work, Live KC

- k & j

 

 

 

We promise to share a new way to work out this Friday; mainly because we realized we're too old to party like it's 1999 and we could use a good detox.

Yelling. Angry. Waving my hands a lot.

"Slam poetry. Yelling. Angry. Waving my hands a lot. Specific point of view on things. Cynthia. Cyn-thi-a. Jesus died for our Cynthia’s. Jesus cried. Runaway bride. Julia Roberts. Julia rob-hurts. Cynthia. Mmmmm Cynthia, you’re dead. You are dead. Be boop beep you're dead." *mic drop*

This eloquent piece of poetry is an excerpt from the classic movie 22 Jump Street. If you're not familiar with the scene, you should go rent the movie and post up with a bottle of wine (or beer. Whatever strikes your fancy) while you watch. That's your homework for the night. We're in the wrong profession because we would clearly make the best teachers.
                                  

Third Thursdays at the Nelson-Atkins Museum are devoted to showcasing local, KC talent. This Thursday's event is a POETRY SLAM! The artists are passionate about their writing and have no qualms about sharing their thoughts with the audience. That being said, you may want to leave the kids at home because the poetry is not suitable for all ages.

Last call for Midnight Underground Circus tickets! You're crazy if you don't want to get weird with us at the circus! How often do you get to play carnival games with endless beer and a DJ until 2a? Almost never. The website is very mysterious stating "nonstop wonder and amazement" and "surprise musical performance at the stroke of midnight"! Aaaaaand the anticipation is killing us.  They've left us hanging and all we can do is speculate. Will it be KC native Tech N9ne? Will there be a Spice Girls reunion?

This last bit is difficult for us to share. We debated it for quite some time: Do we keep this new found information to ourselves until we claim our tickets or do we do the right thing by letting all of our friends be "in the know" too? Because we are the nicest people in the world, we decided on the latter.

Here it is...

KEVIN HART IS COMING TO KANSAS CITY

The Sprint Center announced last week that he'll be coming to KC on August 22nd. Tickets go on sale Friday! You're welcome, everybody!

Goodnight, KC

- K & J

#keshandjac to share what you're getting into this weekend

Calling All Couch Potatoes

TGIF! Cause it's been a hell of a week. Ya feel me? ...errr us? As a New Year's goal, we are challenging ourselves to run two 5ks and one 10k in 2015. To ensure we reach our goal, we decided to sign up for our first race. When searching for our first race of 2015 we remembered the wise words of Bey. "A diva is a female version of a hustla"- so we had no other choice than to pick the Diva Dash. 

The Diva Dash is on March 28th in the OP- a little sooner than we would like. Working out is hard so we're both using the Couch to 5K training program found here to make it a little easier. The program calls for nine weeks of training and if you've looked at a calendar recently you'd know we have less than nine weeks until the race. Soo we should probably start training...whoops.

We may have been a tad ambitious with selecting a race in March, but we'll try condensing some of the initial weeks together and let you know how it goes. (A brisk 5 min walk and 60 second jog for day one? We've got this) If all else fails, we can jog walk it. The effort is all that matters, right? We'll be channeling our inner Beyoncé- whether we are running or walking. We'll just make sure our walk is more of a sassy strut.

Who's with us? Comment below to share if you're running in the Diva Dash or what other races we should sign up for this year.

Cheers to the weekend,

-K & J

#keshandjac while you're running around KC

Thanks, Bey, for this week's musical motivation.

What's Happening, KC?

This weekend is Valentine's Day- one of the most commercialized holidays of the year. Let's be real it's not about love, it's about something much greater- chocolate. We aren't talking about just any chocolate here, you have to get the good stuff. If you want a delicious VDay treat and to support local, make a stop at Christopher Elbow Artisanal Chocolates  in KCMO or Cocoa Dolce in Overland Park. 

 

 **We were going to begin this post by sharing with you all the background of Valentine's Day. However, after Wikipedia-ing (that's a legit verb) Saint Valentine's Day, we were unable to focus on learning the origin because our brains are focused on chocolate. Shocking, we know.**

 

Chocolate Ale, Boulevard Brew Co

Cocoa Dolce & Christopher Elbow offer handcrafted, modern sweets with unique flavors that are so visually pleasing you almost don't want to eat them. Almost... Christopher Elbow also teamed up with Boulevard to create KC's beloved Chocolate Ale. Both confectionaries are a little more expensive than the average assorted boxes of chocolates, but are worth the $$$ for a special occasion.

 

For those of you into bondage watching movies about bondage and semi-love stories, 50 Shades of Gray is out this weekend. We suggest trying out Cinetopia in Prairie Fire. (Cinetopia is across the street from Cocoa Dolce. We just made your Valentine's Day plans too easy.)

 For those celebrating "Single's Awareness Day" or for the couples who still know how to have a good time, celebrations for Mardi Gras by way of a pub crawl will be going on in the Power & Light District. More details here. 

 

Next Friday, February 20th- Kansas City is hosting the Midnight Underground Circus at Municipal Auditorium. There will be circus acts, carnival games, a DJ, bottomless beer (thanks Boulevard), and a special musical performance. We're not into clowns, but this sounds like a different kind of circus that we're up for and we already have our tickets! The tickets are originally $62, but with the offer code "Facebook" you get 20% off!

 

Regarding the holiday this weekend: Fellas, DO NOT forget to get your ladies the basics. Good chocolate and flowers. Cause if you forget....there is a good chance she will forget to sleep with you for the next couple weeks... You've been warned.

 Hope Cupid shoots ya in the butt,

 

- K & J

#keshandjac and let us know your Valentine's plans

 

 

How to Have a Successful Pub Crawl

Kansas City has so many good bars you cant just choose one! This past Saturday, #keshandjac went out for a friend's birthday celebration. He had the fabulous idea (well Jac had the idea and suggested it to him) to do a pub crawl. This was a great opportunity to check out multiple hot Kansas City spots.

Stockyard fries-Nom Nom Nom

It started at Julep, a cocktail lounge, on Pennsylvania in Westport. Their motto is "Bringing class and kicking ass" which I can't disagree with. It has an intimate setting and specializes in whiskey drinks- takes you back a few decades. Next stop Beer Kitchen- Sadly, not everyone made it here, but we made it a point to. Beer Kitchen is one of our favorite spots in Westport with amazing food and endless beer selections. I will say it may not be the best choice for a great pub crawl since it is more resturant-esque. We stopped here for dinner because we've have both made past mistakes of doing heaving drinking on an empty stomach- never ends well.

How well do you know KC? Can you guess where this is

Stop three was The Foundry (we missed out as we were still filling our bellies)  But from past experiences this is a great place for a large group. You can rent out the upper level or just hang around the bar- very spacious, reasonably priced, and FYI they also have some good eats (it almost always comes back to food with us)

















After Foundry we headed to Harry's. Harry's has a great patio- unfortunately even though the weather was amaze balls this weekend, it was still a bit too chilly to sit out there. The pub crawl had SO many people it was overcrowded in the bar so we opted to leave a bit before the rest of the group and head to the next spot and a Westport staple- Kellys Westport Inn.  

 If you have never been here, you need to. Saturday nights are filled with cheap beers, live music, and a balloon artist. (this is completely genius. what drunk person wouldn't want a balloon animal?) If you are feeling competitive they also have pop-a-shot and darts towards the back. And of course- Pizza. (Again with the food). Finally, we made it to the last Westport stop- Buzzard Beach.* This place has its pros and cons- PROS pool table & jukebox where we get to pick the tunes. CONS it smells like a portapotty.  After this, the party split a bit....The last stretch of the crawl was to head to O'dowd's on the Plaza. Although we are big fans of O'dowd's (amazing upstairs patio, even better dance floor) we weren't really into the idea of finding a taxi to get there because at this point in the night we needed to either go home to sleep or dance. Obviously we were responsible and went dancing...so we headed over to Firefly lounge. All in all the pub crawl was a success. And most importantly the Birthday Boy had a great time-- as seen below.

Maybe too much fun....

We are very supported of pub crawls, whether they are scheduled events like the Crawl for Cancer or Waldo Crawldo- or a bit more impromptu like our experience last weekend. We think everyone should partake in one or five a year. If you are super jelly of our good time and want to have one of your own- here are some tips for a successful pub crawl.

1. Have a schedule but don't keep it too scheduled. It's probably a good idea to have a back up plan if your group is unable to get into a certain bar/restaurant. i.e. the group was too large for Beer Kitchen. 

2. Don't expect everyone to stay the entire night. The birthday boy made it clear that he would not be offended if people showed up late or left early. Don't get caught up on everyone being at every bar with you especially if you have a large party. Just party.
3. Do something unique. Give your party a theme, make shirts, or even button (as seen below)



Look at that alliteration!

 

4. Don't take too many shots. We did not follow this rule and our bodies regretted it the next day. Do as we say, not as we do.

Follow us on Twitter @keshandjac & #keshandjac when you crawl around KC.

-K&J

*Sorry! No link for Buzzard Beach they do not have a website #oldschool

Evidence of an eventful night: